Sometimes I don’t know what I am feeling until I see it. I’ve been working on a new painting for a while now and have discovered some old feelings that were really there all along but somehow I just didn’t recognize them. Painting can be not just about what you see and how you apply paint, but about who you are, what you think about and how you feel things in a way that is both personal and then hopefully universal. Sometimes you think that what you are feeling goes beyond your individual experience but the way you’ve portrayed those feelings or thoughts doesn’t connect for the viewer. When you’ve made a successful piece of art you’ve been able to connect all the dots, starting with yourself and moving outwards (for introverts) or starting from the outside and moving inwards where you then are able to be cognizant of what you have actually been doing on a more personal level. For years I started from a introverted perspective, but in the writing of this I realize that slowly I have shifted over into the extroverted world of starting with something out there and moving back inwards. It’s a funny experience to realize that has been what’s been going on. With this new painting I’ve connected with feelings of loss. The older I get the more I know that I’ve been thinking about time and it’s passing and so it is not surprising that feelings of loss have come up. I was just surprised to find it while working on this new painting.

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